From Guest Blogger Amy Gorman (AKA The Wife)
Perhaps one of your goals has been to meet new friends. In my experience as a 50+ year old female who moved to a new community, this can be difficult. I’ve made and ended a few friendships in my adult life, and I’ve come to realize that quality is vastly more important than quantity when it comes to those who you want to be part of your life. I made the difficult decision a couple years ago to end a friendship with someone who I thought would be in my life forever. Without going into the details, the decision was made to protect my mental health and allow me to open up my heart to new friends. It nearly broke me doing this, but I can now say with full confidence I did the right thing. Here’s the deal: Friendships are an integral part of the human experience, providing support, laughter, and shared experiences. However, just as friendships blossom, they can also fade away, leaving behind a trail of emotions that can be challenging to navigate. Losing friends is an inevitable part of life, and while it may be painful, it also offers opportunities for self-discovery, resilience, and personal growth.
Understanding the Dynamics of Friendship:
Friendships, like any other relationship, go through phases of growth and change. People evolve, circumstances shift, and interests diverge. Understanding that the dynamics of friendships are fluid can make it easier to accept the natural progression that sometimes leads to drifting apart.The Impact of Losing Friendships:
Losing a friend can be emotionally taxing. It's essential to acknowledge the impact it has on mental well-being. Feelings of sadness, loneliness, or even guilt are common, and it's crucial to give yourself the space to process these emotions.Acceptance and Letting Go:
Acceptance is a key step in healing from the loss of a friendship. It involves acknowledging that, sometimes, people grow apart, and it doesn't diminish the value of the time you spent together. Letting go doesn't mean forgetting; it means freeing yourself from the emotional weight of clinging to something that has naturally run its course.Self-Reflection:
Losing a friendship offers an opportunity for self-reflection. Consider what you've learned from the relationship, the positive aspects, and any patterns or behaviors that may have contributed to its end. Use this insight to grow and develop healthier connections in the future.Communication and Closure:
If possible, seek closure through open and honest communication. It's okay to express your feelings and understand the other person's perspective. While closure doesn't always come in the form of a conversation, it can provide a sense of understanding and peace.Building a Support System:
Surround yourself with a support system of other friends, family, or even professional counselors who can offer understanding and encouragement during challenging times. Sharing your feelings can be therapeutic and help in the healing process.Embracing New Connections:
As one chapter closes, another begins. Embrace the opportunity to meet new people, explore new interests, and build fresh connections. It's a chance to enrich your life with diverse experiences and perspectives.Cultivating Self-Love:
Losing a friendship can sometimes lead to questioning one's worth. It's crucial to cultivate self-love and recognize your inherent value outside of any specific relationship. Engage in activities that bring joy, invest time in personal development, and prioritize self-care.Losing friendships is undoubtedly a challenging aspect of life, but it's also a testament to growth and change. Embracing the pain, learning from the experience, and channeling those emotions into positive avenues can lead to a more resilient, self-aware, and enriched life. Remember, the journey of healing from lost friendships is an opportunity to rediscover and reinvent yourself along the way. I’m happy to say I’m lucky to have a group of wonderful and supportive friends who I cherish with all my heart.
““I don’t even know what I would do without my women friends. I have my friends, so therefore I am. I exist because I have my women friends,” ”